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Writer's pictureMelissa Calcara

How to Support a Child Who Struggles with Both Academics and Anxiety

Supporting a child who is struggling with academics and experiencing anxiety can be tough. It’s a challenge many parents face, and it can feel overwhelming at times. However, there are several strategies that can help children manage both schoolwork and their anxious feelings, giving them the support they need to thrive. Here’s how to provide that support effectively.



1. Recognize the Signs of Anxiety


Children don’t always express their anxiety in words. Often, it can show up as physical symptoms like stomach aches, headaches, trouble sleeping, or changes in behavior such as irritability, mood swings, or avoidance of schoolwork. Paying attention to these signs and listening when they express feeling overwhelmed can make a big difference. Recognizing anxiety early on is the first step in helping them cope and easing the pressure around schoolwork.


2. Create a Safe and Calm Environment


Having a calm, organized study space at home can help a child focus better and reduce feelings of anxiety. A quiet, clutter-free corner with all the necessary supplies creates a sense of order and security. Establishing a predictable routine for homework, breaks, and relaxation can also provide structure, making the whole process feel less stressful and more manageable.


3. Break Tasks into Manageable Steps


A large assignment or stack of homework can feel overwhelming. One effective way to help is to break down tasks into smaller, more manageable steps. For example, if a big project is due, list out individual tasks, like researching, outlining, and revising. Focusing on one small step at a time can make the task less intimidating and more achievable.


4. Practice Positive Reinforcement


Kids who struggle with anxiety often focus on their perceived failures and overlook their successes. Encouraging a growth mindset can be as simple as praising specific efforts. Instead of just saying, "Good job," try to recognize what they did well, like saying, "You worked really hard on that math problem." Positive reinforcement helps boost their confidence and reminds them that effort leads to progress.


5. Teach Relaxation Techniques


Learning relaxation techniques can be incredibly helpful for a child feeling anxious. Simple strategies like deep breathing exercises, mindfulness activities, or short movement breaks can calm them down when schoolwork feels overwhelming. Regularly practicing these techniques can empower them to self-soothe when they start to feel anxious.


6. Encourage Self-Compassion


Children who struggle academically often become their own harshest critics. Teaching self-compassion involves reminding them that everyone has strengths and weaknesses and that it’s okay to make mistakes. Encouraging positive self-talk, such as saying, "It’s okay not to get everything right the first time," helps them build resilience and approach learning with a more open mindset.


7. Set Realistic Goals


While it's important to encourage children to challenge themselves, setting overly ambitious goals can lead to increased anxiety. Work together to set achievable, short-term goals that build on their strengths. For example, instead of expecting an entire book report to be completed in one sitting, set a goal to finish the outline first. Gradually increasing the difficulty of tasks as they build confidence can help them experience a sense of accomplishment.


8. Teach Problem-Solving Skills


Anxiety can make it hard for children to see solutions to their problems, especially when it comes to schoolwork. Teaching simple problem-solving techniques can make a big difference. Encourage them to identify the problem, brainstorm possible solutions, and choose the best one to try. Asking questions like, "What do you think we could do to tackle this problem?" helps them develop critical thinking skills and feel more in control.


9. Communicate with Teachers


Teachers are a valuable resource when it comes to supporting a child who struggles with both academics and anxiety. Reaching out to the teacher to share concerns can open up a dialogue about possible strategies for support. This might include modifications to homework, extra support in class, or access to school resources like counseling services.


10. Seek Professional Help When Needed


If anxiety is significantly affecting daily life, seeking help from a professional counselor or therapist can be very beneficial. Professional support provides a safe space for the child to learn coping strategies and tools to manage their anxiety. Early intervention can make a big difference in helping them overcome both academic and emotional challenges.


11. Make Time for Fun and Relaxation


Children need time to relax and unwind, especially when they are dealing with both academic struggles and anxiety. Encourage activities they enjoy, whether it’s playing outside, drawing, listening to music, or simply spending time with family. Making time for fun helps create a sense of balance and reduces overall stress.


12. Focus on Progress, Not Perfection


It’s important to celebrate progress, no matter how small. Recognizing the effort and growth, whether it’s completing a part of an assignment or learning a new concept, helps shift the focus from perfection to the learning process. Encouraging this mindset teaches that learning is a journey, and it’s okay to make mistakes along the way.


Final Thoughts

Supporting a child who struggles with both academics and anxiety requires patience, understanding, and a variety of strategies. By creating a calm environment, breaking tasks into manageable steps, and practicing relaxation techniques, children can be guided toward building the skills and confidence they need to succeed. Focusing on progress rather than perfection and providing positive reinforcement can make a big difference in helping them navigate their challenges. With the right support, every child can learn to manage their anxiety and find success in their academic journey.

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